


Don't Shoot the Messenger

by Rhys (rhyssj)



Category: NSYNC, Popslash
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2002-07-18
Updated: 2002-07-18
Packaged: 2019-04-19 23:21:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14247999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rhyssj/pseuds/Rhys
Summary: The messenger is actually Justin.





	Don't Shoot the Messenger

Joey found Lance crying one afternoon, but he knew Lance could be moody, so Joey was all right with that, just really worried. Joey had come over with Brianna, just to hang out for a bit before the tour started and things got crazy. When he let himself in, Lance was bawling like a baby in the hallway. Brianna started crying too, out of sympathy. 

“It’ll be all right,” Joey said, wrapping an arm around Lance’s shoulders and pulling him in for a hug. Lance wept against his chest, tears so heavy that Joey’s shirt was already damp. Brianna wailed with him. Joey squeezed them both tightly. “Whatever happened, Lance, we’ll deal with it. Okay? Everything will be fine.” 

“Space,” Lance gasped then started sobbing again, curling his fists in Joey’s tee-shirt and pulling the thin fabric to his face. Brianna fisted her own tiny hands in Joey’s collar, huge tears rolling down her face. “Me. Space. Yes.” 

“Huh?” Joey asked, lifting Brianna higher in his arms. His own eyes were burning. 

“They said. Me in space, if I.” Lance’s eyes started squirting, and his breath came in sharp bursts, watery and painful. Joey hugged him again, patting him on the back. Brianna continued to cry. “If I want, me. In space,” Lance explained, choking out the words. 

“Lance, start at the beginning,” Joey said calmly. He bounced Brianna with one arm and let go of Lance, rooting around in his pocket for the wad of tissues he carried around, mostly for Brianna, who was entirely composed of snot, it seemed. He handed one to Lance, who dabbed at his own eyes as he struggled for air, then wiped Brianna’s face before she drowned. “You in space. Am I getting that much?” 

Lance blew his nose loudly. “Yes.” He scrubbed the tissue over his face. “If I can get six months off, and I can pass all the medical tests, and. Hold on,” Lance said, tearing up again, and he cried for a minute until he calmed down. “And if they get sponsors,” Lance continued carefully, “they’ll send me to space. Oh my lord!” Lance’s eyes started leaking again. 

“You in space,” Joey said, and Lance nodded. “Holy fucking good god, Lance! Shit, man, that’s awesome! Jesus Christ!” Joey was shouting, he knew it, which set Lance off again, which set Brianna off again, but he couldn’t help it. Lance in space, his dream. Joey grabbed him in another hug, squeezing so hard that Lance started laughing wetly. “This is incredible, man! Jesus! Wow! You in space!” 

“I know, I know. I can hardly believe it,” Lance said, hiccuping. He grabbed Brianna by the head and peppered her with kisses, and that calmed her down a bit, though she was still blotchy and red. Joey was afraid he was going to drop her, he was shaking so hard. “Okay. I’m calm. I’m good. And hey you, sweetie pie.” Lance took Brianna and nuzzled her neck. She sniffled, so Joey wiped her nose again, even as she tried to pull away. 

“Dude, this is insane,” Joey said, dazed himself now that Lance wasn’t in hysterics. Lance in space, absolutely the coolest thing ever. Joey hugged him again, right around the waist, and he smelled like aftershave. Lance in space. Wow. Joey was so happy for Lance that he was afraid he would burst. “God,” he said again, and started crying, too. 

~~~ 

If the world was to be considered solely in terms of black and white, Joey was straight. But it wasn’t, and Joey was stupid. Very, very stupid. Chris wouldn’t ever tell him that, of course. But still, Joey was stupid, and not very straight at all. Chris wanted to poke his own eardrums out, so he wouldn’t have to hear about it. 

Joey got these crushes, and he didn’t even realise it, and that drove Chris nuts. Utterly, terribly nuts. It made him want to kick Joey in the nuts, even though the balls of a friend were considered protected territory, like Yellowstone Park or all that space in Canada. Joey was stupid, and Chris had just about enough of that. 

“Did Lance get his hair cut?” Joey asked, stroking his chin. They were in Tacoma, setting up for the new tour and doing some rehearsals, though they didn’t need many. Chris looked over at Lance, who was talking to Pyro to make sure that everything blew up in a way that wouldn’t burn the teenies and horribly scar them. Chris kinda hoped the fireworks went awry, anyway. 

“No, Joe. Lance didn’t get his hair cut,” Chris said, coming back to what Joey was saying. He wanted to take that folding chair Joey was sitting on and batter his skull. Chris could not go through this again, could not take another round of Joey’s obliviousness. It was like seeing a friend do something exceptionally stupid (which Joey was doing) and not being able to make fun of him for doing it, because it wasn’t like he would even get his own moronic tendencies in hindsight. And Joey was a big adorable puppy, and Chris didn’t kick puppies, ever. So Chris heaved a massive sigh. “C got a haircut, Justin got a haircut, I got a haircut. Lance didn’t. Lance has had the same haircut for four years. He’s an android. It doesn’t grow.” 

“He looks different,” Joey said slowly. 

“Of course he does,” Chris muttered, rubbing his face with his hands. This was some sort of Lance-in-space-induced trauma, Chris was sure. 

“He’s lost weight, though,” Joey continued, and Chris looked over. Lance lifted his arms over his head, gesturing wildly at the stage, and yes, okay, Chris could concede Bass was a bit more trim than he used to be, but still. “He’s looking good, you know. I was thinking about getting a personal trainer.” Joey paused. “Lance looks really good, man. Look at him.” 

“I’m looking,” Chris said, watching Lance clap delightedly. 

“Well, you must have noticed, you know, since you, with him” Joey said slowly, looking over at Chris, and Chris shrugged. “You still. With him?” The strange sort of tone to Joey’s voice convinced Chris to lie through his teeth. 

“Very rarely,” Chris assured him, “very, very rarely.” 

“But C.” 

“Also, very rarely. You know,” Chris said, sensing a change in conversation, and thank fucking god for that, really, “we don’t anymore. Me and Lance, or C and Lance, or all of us together. It’s just. He’s not really into it too much. I guess, you know. He wants something more concrete or something. A boyfriend.” 

“Good. He deserves it,” Joey said, nodding in agreement. “Lance is a really good guy.” 

~~~ 

Lance read over the lyrics to Do Your Thing again, sitting beside the coffee machine and drinking from an already cool cup. In the corner of his eye, he saw a blip of movement, but when he looked up, the room was still empty. He hummed under his breath, reading, then saw another flicker. Leaning forward, he glanced around before shrugging. Nothing. 

“Bass!” Chris shouted, suddenly right there, and Lance splashed them both with coffee, jumping in fright. “Ha, got you. You suck man, I cannot believe you didn’t see me,” Chris looped himself over Lance’s shoulders, “what’re you reading, Bass?” 

“Lyrics,” Lance said, staring at the stained sheet of crumpled paper as his pencil-written words slowly dripped away. His other hand was still pressed to his chest, his heart beating erratically. Chris was heavy, and Lance tried to shrug him off. “What do you want?” 

“Joey has another one of his straight guy crushes,” Chris said solemnly, and Lance sighed. 

Joey and his crushes – it meant that for the next, like, forever, they were going to hear about why this man of Joey’s was the greatest thing in the world. And they were always strange crushes too, like Dave the lighting guy and Hugh Grant, George Whatever-the-Fuck from Much Music, and the drummer from Smashmouth, and just a really weird assortment of people. Usually, the unconscious fawning only lasted a week or two, but they would forever be held in high esteem by Joey. To Lance’s knowledge, he’d never slept with any of them. 

“Who is it this time? Wait, let me guess. Nelly,” Lance said, and Chris shook his head. “Um. All right. Some Olympic athlete?” They had just performed in Salt Lake City, and Joey had charmed entire countries. But Chris shook his head again. “All right, Chris. I obviously suck at this game. Who?” 

“You,” Chris said simply. “This morning, he told me all about your new haircut –” 

“But I didn’t –” 

“I know.” Chris slipped down onto the couch beside Lance, hooking an arm around his neck. “Then he admired your trim, muscular body. He likes it; he’s going to get his own personal trainer, he says. Like, as if, but he said this, Bass.” 

“I have been working out,” Lance said. “It doesn’t necessarily mean –” 

“Oh, boy, Bass. Yes, it does, because you haven’t heard the best part yet. The best part came when Joey, poor, straight Joey asked me about us,” Chris explained and grinned delightedly. Chris was squirming too, which meant his excitement level was through the roof. Lance really hated him, in a way that meant he didn’t hate Chris at all but wanted to. “Then! It gets better, Bass. He asked about C. And he gave me this look, you know, and the way he said it. And for the grand finale, poor Joseph Fatone said, and I quote, ‘Lance is a really good guy.’ Sorry, Bass, but it seems you’re now the object of Joey’s affection. ” 

“I am not,” Lance said. It couldn’t be true. “He’s my best friend.” 

“And he loves you. Isn’t that the sweetest? Adorable,” Chris decided and pinched Lance’s cheeks. Hard. Irritated, Lance batted at him until Chris sat back, satisfied. “Oh, and by the way. That thing we do every Thursday and Monday night? No longer. I promised Joey we didn’t do stuff like that anymore.” 

Lance groaned, and Chris smacked his cheek with a kiss. 

“Dude, until Fatone the Love Master lets you out of his sights, you’re living the celibate lifestyle. I can’t touch you, man. That just wouldn’t be fair.” Chris strummed with energy, bouncing in place, and Lance wanted to drink gasoline and die. Celibacy. Horrible. “Oh my god, I cannot _wait_ to tell C! He is going to love this!” 

~~~ 

Justin liked spending time with Joey because Joey had been dumped by Kelly exactly fourteen times, and he always took it hard, moped and regretted and swore he’d never love again. Then she’d take him back, and it’d happen all over again. But when Chris got out of a relationship, he usually took it to mean he was no longer worthy of living, and JC never noticed when he was dumped, since he sucked at relationships, and Lance had been dumped only twice, for being too gay, so that didn’t count. But Joey was always getting dumped and bouncing back, which gave Justin hope. 

Joey was the only one Justin had told about the Britney-thing. Like the fact that Justin was pretty sure they’d mostly broken up, like, last week, which sucked really hard, but the relief, well, Justin didn’t count on that, and he felt like a terrible person. 

“And I still like her, but I don’t think I love her,” Justin explained as Joey nodded. Unlike Chris or JC, Joey wasn’t humouring Justin, which was nice. Justin liked to be listened to and taken seriously. Usually, only his mother extended him that courtesy, and Britney. “But how do you tell someone that? I think I did, but who the hell ever knows what I’m saying, you know? I can barely follow myself.” 

“Uh huh,” Joey said, nodding. 

“Right. So I have to tell her, once and for all, Britney, baby, it’s over. I have to do my own thing, and it can’t be with you. That sounds good, I think,” Justin said, scratching his chin. “I mean, she’s gotta respect a guy who has a mission plan in life, even if it doesn’t involve her anymore. Or, at the very least, honesty. Honesty never hurt anyone.” 

Joey lifted his eyebrows. “Lance is always being dumped for being honest.” 

“Duh,” Justin said and rolled his eyes. “The problem with Lance is he’s gay, and traumatised, and keeps dating chicks who fit this, like, warped view he has on heterosexuality. And when he finally comes out to them, he expects them to be so charmed by him that they’ll be his beards. Damn. If I didn’t have a chance in hell of getting laid by Lance Bass, I would give up and move onto an easier target, too. But anyway. I think I’ll just tell Britney the truth.” 

“Lance deserves better than that, anyway. Honesty is key, I think. I was always honest with Kelly, which is why she kept dumping me, but Lance was always there, assuring me it was the best thing in the long run. Shit like that comes back to bite you in the ass,” Joey explained, tapping his own cheek with one finger. Justin nodded. 

“No, I know. That’s why I’m going to be honest, and tell her how I really feel,” Justin said, still bobbing his head. That was precisely what he was going to do. Just tell Britney that they weren’t working out, because he wanted to test his own waters and stop drinking from hers, despite the fact she was both pure and clean (in the way that yes, she wasn’t a virgin, but wasn’t skanky about it. Unless you considered her clothes, then okay, a bit skanky. But she definitely didn’t have any STDs or whatever, so Justin considered that pure and clean, definitely). 

“Lance really likes Britney,” Joey said thoughtfully. 

“Great. Then he can date her and leave me out of it. Except, Lance is gay. That was a great plan, though, thanks.” Justin punched Joey in the arm, and Joey barely winced. Tipping his head, Justin looked at Joey, who was staring wistfully at the wall, his brow furrowed slightly as if pondering some great truth about life. “Hey,” Justin said suddenly. “Why are we talking about Lance?” 

“I don’t know,” Joey said. “You brought him up.” 

Justin knew that he most certainly did not. 

~~~ 

“C!” Chris shouted, prancing across the arena floor and sliding into the stage. 

JC paused, a straw between his lips as he sipped at his ginger-ale. His stomach was all twisted and anxious, and would be until that first show when he remembered how to be JC Chasez, superstar. Sometimes, JC felt like he forgot. 

Chris grabbed JC by the cheeks and squished them with his palms. “C! Great news!” 

“Please stop shouting, Chris. Everyone is staring,” JC said through mushed lips, and Chris looked around. The lighting guys, including Dave, were frozen in place, waiting to hear Chris’s declaration. With a sigh, JC tugged him under the stage then folded his hand over Chris’s mouth. Chris never moved his own hands. Softly, JC spoke around the straw, “quiet, Chris. Indoor voice, man,” before putting down the drink. It wasn’t safe around Chris, and JC didn’t like wasting things. 

“Fuck, C. I get it. Come here, man. I’ll whisper it,” Chris mumbled and waggled his tongue lewdly, or as lewdly as he could, squeezing it through JC’s fingers. Disgusted, JC removed his hand, and Chris smirked and unfurled his tongue again. It was long, like a snake. 

JC shook his head, his lips quirked at the corners despite wanting to stay straight-faced. It was worse if he encouraged Chris in any way because then he risked getting thrown over Chris’s shoulder and twirled around until he puked. “No way, man. You tell me from right there.” 

Chris hopped over to the left. “Not from here?” 

“Stop,” JC said and giggled a bit. “No, seriously. Tell me, man.” 

“Joey loves Lance. He informed me this morning,” Chris said, squeezing JC’s cheeks again until even JC’s eyes started to shrink. It wasn’t comfortable, but the thing with Chris was just to take it, not to fight it, or else Chris got offended. “Isn’t that wild?” 

“No way!” 

“Yes way! You should have seen the big bozo. All talking about Lance, and telling me about what a great guy Lance is, and how he wants to marry him.” JC crooked an eyebrow, and Chris moved his palms in circles over JC’s face. “No! Seriously! You don’t believe me.” 

“You had me right up until the marriage part,” JC muttered. Mentally, he willed Chris to let go of his head, but it didn’t seem to work. Chris did stop pushing, though, and started stroking JC’s cheek idly with a thumb, looking thoughtful. “What?” 

“Okay, maybe I lied about the marriage part, but seriously, Joey loves Lance.” 

“I hope they’re very happy,” JC said. 

“Well, you won’t be, man. No sex for you!” Chris said and pressed JC’s cheeks together again, hard enough that JC’s gums started aching. It was like a black bear attack; playing dead was really the only option. “Lance has to save himself for Joey. I decided.” 

“That doesn’t mean you and I,” JC said, leaving his words lingering. 

“I like how you think,” Chris said, kissing JC’s fish lips, “no, you’re right. That shouldn’t mean you and I can’t continue, because that just wouldn’t be fair, us being punished because Joey decides Lance is the greatest thing since sliced bread. You’re absolutely right.” 

“Good,” JC said. “Now, can you let go of my face?” 

“Oh, sure. Man, ask me these things, C. I’m not heartless. Jeez.” Chris kissed both his cheeks softly, the hairs of his beard scratching JC’s skin, prickly like a cactus. “That better?” 

“Yeah,” JC said. It was a lie, but Chris always had the best intentions. 

~~~ 

Lance couldn’t deal, knowing that Joey was looking at him and admiring him from a distance. It’d been a busy few days since Chris had said anything, and Lance hadn’t said much to Joey except, “how’s Bri doing?” and “hey, pass me the cream cheese.” He couldn’t think of anything to say; it wasn’t like Joey was acting any different around him. At all, really. It was the first inkling of hope that Chris was just jumping to conclusions, as usual. 

“Hey, C,” Lance said one morning, before they left for the arena in Portland. JC smiled and fixed up a bagel for Lance too, spreading the cheese right to the edge, making sure it was all perfectly flat and even. Lance was just grateful Joey wasn’t around; they always seemed to meet at the lunch table. “I think Chris is lying.” 

JC twisted up his lips then conceded, “maybe. He does that, sometimes.” 

“Like when he decided he was gay,” Lance said. 

“Well, he had us all going on that one for a while,” JC pointed out, smearing the last of the spread onto Lance’s bagel then sliding it over to him. JC started to slice another one. “And it was almost true, right? Chris’s lies usually have some basis in reality, however warped. Don’t you like Joey?” 

“He’s my best friend,” Lance said. Inside, his stomach was cramping. He really didn’t need Joey to be in love with him, or crushing on him, or even noticing him, beyond normal friend acknowledgements, like that Lance drove a nice car or that they both liked Hugh Grant movies. “I just think, maybe, Chris is not telling the whole truth. Maybe even making it up entirely.” 

“It’s possible,” JC admitted slowly. 

“Yeah,” Lance agreed. He didn’t believe it, either. 

~~~ 

Justin spent an entire evening in Tacoma, trying to explain to Britney why he couldn’t date her anymore. She looked at him and asked, “so you’re not my boyfriend, starting right now?” When Justin nodded, she punched him in the face and stalked out of the room, leaving him bleeding and bruised on the floor. He crawled into bed on the bus and slept it off. The next morning, he had a black eye and a sore nose, but it was nothing he couldn’t take. 

When Justin woke up and got off the bus, the only one around was Joey, who was drinking coke in the café since he hated coffee. He winced when he saw Justin, and Justin nodded pathetically. It was a bit worse than he wanted to think about, he knew, but still, once the swelling went down, Justin was sure it’d be all right. 

“You wanna do something?” Justin asked, and Joey shrugged. “Where is everybody?” 

“I don’t know where Lance is,” Joey replied, swishing his coke around in the glass. 

“Uh, all right. I guess it’s just us then,” Justin said slowly. Joey was getting a bit obsessive about Lance, and since Justin wasn’t stupid, he knew what that meant, so he just stood up and went to find a map. He wasn’t entirely sure which city they were in. 

They went to a bookstore. Lance had mentioned wanting a book or three, and Joey wanted to buy him all three and then some. Joey was so far gone, Justin thought sadly, and if Joey’s pattern was true to form, nothing would ever happen. The whole love affair would be one-sided and quiet until Joey moved on and did it all again. Justin felt Joey just needed some guidance, so he headed over the sexuality section, in search of self-help books. 

He picked up Beautiful Shades of Grey: The Glorious Truth About Bisexuality by J Arthur Finnegan. He’d read it once when JC picked it up for Chris. Justin wasn’t bisexual, but it was a good read anyway, and it’d answered some questions he had about Chris’s need to see everything in black and white. Chris liked the book and had been completely changed by it, so maybe Joey would, too. Justin could hope, anyway. 

Justin browsed for a while until he saw Joey marching to the counter, arms full of books. Justin sighed. Joey wasn’t stupid; Justin knew this. Joey was a pretty smart guy, but he was totally blind to his own same-sex tendencies. If they could be considered tendencies, because nothing ever really happened, and Justin admitted, perhaps, it was more of an aesthetic appreciation or an intense admiration or something like that. But not with Lance, no way, not if Justin had any say in it. 

Joey and Lance were way cute together. Justin felt this was a universal truth. 

~~~ 

Honestly speaking, the real reason why Lance really didn’t want Joey to be in love with him was that Lance had been in love with Joey forever. As long as Lance had known Joey, he’d loved him. When they first met, it had been a sort of superficial love, born of extreme relief that these strangers Lance had just signed his life away to were actually pretty cool, and Joey, Lance felt, was the coolest. But over time, the love that Lance felt for Joey developed into something so concrete that Lance was just used to it, like breathing and eating, and knew, without it, he wouldn’t be able to survive. 

So if Joey was in love with him but would never do anything about it (because that was how Joey’s straight guy crushes worked; he crushed from a distance and then it all went away, leaving only an imprint and an infinite admiration on Joey’s part) then that was the cruelest situation that Lance could ever imagine. It made his belly tense up before throwing his breakfast into the bowl of the toilet. 

And Chris lied. Chris lied an awful lot. He was worse than Lance, sometimes, because Lance was always aware he was lying, and Chris just exaggerated a lot, took a small thing and made it huge. Lance didn’t want to outright ask Joey, because for one, Joey hadn’t given Lance any indication that he was head over heels, and two, Chris was an unreliable source of information. And three, Lance hated being embarrassed. If he asked, and Joey denied it (because Joey was straight, despite it all, wasn’t he) then Lance would never get over it. Once he was humiliated, it was impossible for him to ever recover. It was why he would never act again. Shame was Lance’s paralysing fear. 

Lance had a lot of time to think about this on the plane trip to Moscow, his dad sleeping next to him on the flight and snoring. Joey was a snorer, too. 

~~~ 

“Why do they have to make so much fun of him?” Joey asked, watching late night television, and Chris, whose knees were aching so much that he couldn’t go out and opted to stay in with Daddy Joey and a finally-sleeping Brianna (Lance was off in Russia anyway, and Chris didn’t like going out with the golden children. If he was lucky, JC would come back plastered and alone and horny), looked up. Joey’s face was twisted in a scowl. “Lance is just following his dream, you know. It’s really pissing me off.” 

“They make fun of us for everything, man. Don’t get righteous now, or we’re trading you to the Backstreet Boys for ten bucks,” Chris said, rubbing his temples. Lance was still in denial about Joey’s feelings, and Joey didn’t talk about Lance to JC, for whatever reason, but Chris was sure he wasn’t imagining it. If anyone would know, Justin would. He’d been spending a lot of time with Joey during Life After Britney. “Nothing’s gonna pull Lance from his cloud, dude.” 

“But still,” Joey said. 

Chris nodded and closed his eyes again. His knees really fucking hurt. 

~~~ 

Justin was working out when Chris came in, eating a Mars Bar. 

“Hey,” Justin said, panting. 

“Hey.” Chris chewed then swallowed loudly. “Joey loves Lance, you know.” 

“Oh, I know. It’s all he talks about,” Justin said, sitting up and scrubbing a towel across his freshly shaved head. He’d wanted to give the curls a chance to grow, but then he’d been hacked at by a hairdresser-in-training. That was the last time he tried to save money. Chris liked him to be thrifty, but Justin was just no good at it anymore. “Lance this, Lance that. But don’t worry, I’ve got the situation under control. By the end of the tour, they’ll be together and happy, and Joey will stop acting like a school girl with a crush.” 

“A man after my own heart, J. I can always count on you,” Chris said then held out his candy bar. “Hey, want half?” 

“Yes, please,” Justin said. 

~~~ 

In Denver, after having a welcome back dinner with Lance at Wendy’s which hadn’t gone very well (Lance claimed he had nothing to say; Joey felt that Lance was lying to him), Joey returned to his hotel room to find a book tucked under his pillow. It was new, but he hadn’t bought it. Beautiful Shades of Grey: The Glorious Truth About Bisexuality by J Arthur Finnegan. 

Joey looked around. He knew Chris owned a copy, because the moron had decided he couldn’t be gay _and_ straight, and picked gay, since he’d given up on women after Dani. But this wasn’t his. Chris treated books like he did everything else: very, very roughly but with huge amounts of love. Also, he wrote notes in the margins, and highlighted sections, and often dropped books in the bathtub. This one was virginal. 

Tucked inside the front cover was a small picture of Lance, leaning forward and laughing. Joey liked Lance, because while he didn’t laugh often, when he did it was deep and full and honest. There had been times when Joey had been scrubbing his fingers over Lance’s belly, ticking him mercilessly and watching Lance wheeze with laughter, and Joey had paused mid-attack just to look at him. When Lance was happy, Joey was happiest. 

Joey stared at the book then at the picture, back and forth until he was dizzy. “Oh,” he said softly. It was so quiet, even he barely heard it. “Oh.” 

~~~ 

It was around this time, in Grand Forks, that JC shaved himself of all body hair. “Look guys!” He exclaimed, whipping open his robe as they all lounged in the Quiet Room. Lance looked up wearily, and blinked. JC, who had never been that hairy to begin with, was suddenly as smooth as silk. Joey’s jaw dropped, and next to him, Chris choked. 

“How long did that take?” Justin asked, squinting. 

“Four hours,” JC answered proudly, “I did everything, man. Feel me.” 

Justin blanched. “No, thanks, C. That’s all right.” 

“Let me,” Chris said, and Lance pinched his eyes shut. If he saw then he would be tempted, and if he was tempted then he would have to give up his girlish notions that maybe Joey would come around and, like, do something sexy to him. Lance didn’t hold out any hope, really, but if he didn’t at least pretend then he wasn’t getting laid for any real reason. 

“Guys! Please!” Joey shouted suddenly, but Lance still refused to look. The problem with them, as a group, was that they really had no shame around each other anymore. Chris was known to jerk off on the couch, regardless of who was sitting around him, and Justin never, ever went to the bathroom with the door closed, afraid he would miss something. Joey farted a lot, really smelly ones, and JC did stuff like this. Somewhere in it all, Lance realised it wasn’t exactly normal, but it was like changing the spin of the earth now. Impossible. 

~~~ 

Lance spent most of his time in Europe saving himself for Joey. He was a virgin when they started, but so was Justin, so it was fine. He was ragged on, but it wasn’t like he didn’t want to have sex. It was just that the guy he wanted to have sex with didn’t want to have sex with him. But he imagined. He spent exhausted hours in his bed, hand on his dick, imagining. 

Like Joey’s mouth. It would be overly hot, and not overly wet, and when he kissed Lance, Lance’s body would open like a flower. He would want to take off all his clothes, and spread his legs, and give himself to Joey, who would accept, because he wanted Lance so bad that he thought his dick was going to fall off, it hurt that much. And Lance would smile sexily, and nod, and maybe suck Joey off, or let Joey fuck him, slow and careful, of course, because it would be Lance’s first time, and it would be the greatest. 

In reality, Lance returned to the states, went home to Mississippi for a weekend and slept with a guy whose name he didn’t know and had his first crisis of gay faith. Gay sex, which had seemed so great when thought of in terms of him and Joey, was terrible, and awkward, and painful, and Lance, who had known he was gay since he was twelve but took much longer to accept it, spent a lot of time crying where people couldn’t see until it stopped being a big thing. 

It was better, later, when he tried it with JC, who was just about the most wonderful lover a guy could ask for. JC loved sex, loved everything about it, really, and he knew a lot too, so Lance slept with him, as friends. JC was long and lithe and slender, not like Joey at all, but it was sexy anyway, and Lance got back on the proverbial horse of man-on-man sex and had been riding high ever since. When Chris had come out and been eager to try everything, Lance and JC had taken turns with him, and that was good too. And Chris and JC and Lance all together was also very hot, even if the schematics of successful threesomes were still confusing to them. It was fun. 

So if Joey was in love with him then it was too late because Lance no longer had anything to offer like he once did. Sure, he still had himself, but he seemed cheapened somehow. Lance really hated Chris for ever mentioning anything. Lance’s world was upside down, and so long as it kept tumbling, Lance couldn’t think of anything to say to Joey. Joey didn’t seem to have anything to say to him, either. 

~~~ 

JC slept hard and heavy, so when Justin rapped on the door with the top-secret Nsync knock, Chris simply yelled, “come in!” JC didn’t even stir, just stayed where he was, one leg thrown over Chris’s thigh, head over Chris’s heart. Justin came in and crumpled into bed with them, tugging the sheet up over JC’s naked back. Even if Chris could move, he wasn’t sure he wanted to. 

“Lance and Joey are avoiding each other,” Justin said. “My plan appears to suck.” 

“They are?” Chris asked, and Justin nodded. Chris felt like shit. Ever since Chris got full custody of JC’s cock, he’d been sleeping with him, like, every night, so he hadn’t really noticed what was going on beyond the initial discovery that Joey loved Lance. Chris had realised, however, that the two-week mark was long gone, and Joey still followed Lance with his eyes wherever Lance walked but didn’t talk about him anymore, like he finally knew what people were thinking. “Hey, what exactly was your plan?” 

“I gave him that book. The J Arthur Finnegan one. And stuck a picture of Lance in the front cover, like, you know. Saying it without saying it.” Justin shrugged and snuggled into Chris’s armpit, looking over at JC. “I’m not going to have to do that with you and C, am I?” 

“No,” Chris said. Justin squinted at him. “Seriously, no.” 

“Okay,” Justin said. “I guess it’s up to them now. This shouldn’t, like, wreck their friendship or anything, right?” Justin looked up, eyes big and worried, and Chris shook his head. “Okay. Because that would suck. Maybe they’ll just forget about it and go back to normal, you know? Or be like you and C.” 

“Me and C just sleep together,” Chris said quietly. 

“Yeah,” Justin said, watching as JC sighed against Chris’s heart, opening his mouth and leaving a wet patch on Chris’s skin. JC smiled to himself and murmured, before going lax again, his breathing steady. “I can tell.” 

~~~ 

Joey grabbed JC after a show in Buffalo and tugged him into a dark corner. JC’s heart leapt into his throat for a second before he realised who it was then he went willingly. Joey had been kind of quiet. He still talked and everything, but he hadn’t sang falsetto at the top of his lungs in JC’s ear for a long time now. JC kept waiting for him to do it. 

“You guys aren’t laughing at me about the Lance thing, are you?” Joey asked. 

“No, of course not,” JC said. He wasn’t a good liar, but he could do it when the time called for it. And they’d stopped laughing a few days ago, when it quit being funny, so it was true, now. Justin had done something, Chris wouldn’t say more than that, and according to Chris, Joey hadn’t even said Lance’s name for months (when JC toned it down to weeks then to days, then it made sense. Chris had no sense of time). “We wouldn’t. Promise, man.” 

Joey looked at him suspiciously then nodded. “Good, because. You know.” 

“Yeah, don’t worry about it, man. It’s all fine,” JC said, patting his arm. Joey looked tired and miserable, but maybe he was just missing Brianna. JC hoped it was that, anyway. Joey hadn’t really explained the Lance thing to anyone. “You want to watch movies tonight, man? I can make nachos. They gave me that microwave I kept asking for.” 

“Yeah, okay,” Joey said. “All right.” 

~~~ 

Lance was scared and didn’t want to admit it. They had to do minor heart surgery on him, and he’d scheduled a time for it in Boston, but he was afraid, and when he was afraid, he tended not to tell anyone. His plan, as it stood, was to lie about where he was going, get it done and hope that nothing screwed up and he was fine. He almost called his mom, but he didn’t want to worry her. But he was really fucking terrified. 

Finally, he broke down and told Joey. Joey was still his best friend and hadn’t laughed during the Lance in space episode, hadn’t even been pissed about all the snot Lance got on his shirt or the fact that Brianna cried for another hour once Joey got started. 

“Can you come with me?” Lance asked, shuffling his feet over the ground. He couldn’t look at Joey. 

“Yeah, dude. Of course.” Joey squeezed his shoulder. 

Joey brought a book with him but the cover was hidden by floral wrapping paper, like the way his mom used to do it to Harlequins so nobody would realise what she was reading, but if Joey wanted to keep it private then he could. Lance wasn’t going to force Joey into telling him anything he didn’t want to, whether it was the title of some book or all about his love for Lance. 

“Nervous?” Joey asked when they were sitting in a room, Lance on the bed in one of those stupid blue night gowns. He still had his boxers on, underneath, but he felt incredibly naked, anyway. He nodded, and Joey’s face flickered with worry. “This is a routine thing, right?” 

“So they tell me,” Lance muttered. “But it’s my heart.” 

“Important,” Joey said, and Lance nodded. “Well, you’ll be fine.” 

“I know.” Lance scratched his knee. 

When Lance looked up, Joey was lowering himself to the bed. The mattress dipped, and Lance rolled forward, putting a hand on Joey’s thigh to stop himself from falling off. “Okay, Lance, here’s the pep talk,” Joey said and smiled. God, Lance thought, he’d missed that, in avoiding Joey. His big, happy grin. It always made Lance feel better about everything. 

“This is good, because they’re just gonna zap your heart a bit and fix it forever, and JC will be able to stop hassling you, on behalf of your mother, to take your pills, which I know you hate. And it’s just a little surgery, right? It’s not like it’s a quadruple bypass. And this still doesn’t give you permission to take those diet pills, just because your heart is no longer going to burst out of your ears.” 

“I only did that once, Joey,” Lance said. He’d been a bit wired afterwards, and crazy, but how was he to know that diet pills would turn him into a psycho hosebeast? Joey had ended up tying him down to a chair, with Lance’s collection of striped scarfs. “But I know. Really.” 

“You be good,” Joey said, and it took Lance a moment to realise Joey was speaking to his heart, mouth right up against the swell of his pectoral. Under his nightgown, Lance hardened, but Joey, thank god, wasn’t close enough to feel it. Thank god. “You do what the doctors tell you, and don’t do anything stupid, like explode. We need you.” 

Lance smiled, ignoring the shivers racing up and down his spine. “Weirdo.” 

“Just taking care of what’s mine,” Joey said quickly, so fast that Lance didn’t even register it until Joey’s lips touched his, softly, then opened. Lance just sat there, stunned beyond belief, and he was wooden, he knew it, and he wasn’t even surprised when Joey sat back, disappointed. The doctor came in, and Lance babbled about feeling great! Just great! 

Joey had kissed him. Lance was sure he had died, before anything had even started. 

~~~ 

“What’s up with them now?” Justin asked in Hartford as they waited for soundcheck to start. JC looked over, where Joey and Lance were standing next to each other, not speaking. It looked like Lance’s ears were bright red, but JC couldn’t tell for sure. “He’s been blushing for days. Ever since Boston. I find that all very suspicious.” 

“Have they been talking?” JC asked, squinting. He really needed to get glasses. 

“I don’t know. They’re giving me a headache. See, the problem is, we fucked with the method. That’s the big issue here. We didn’t follow the rules and now, instead of being all right with liking girls and just getting random crushes on men, Joey can’t forget Lance, because he’s realised he doesn’t want to. And Lance is so in love with Joey that it just boggles the mind,” Justin explained. JC nodded. 

Justin was the master of breaking it all down into simple and explainable terms, even if it sometimes came out as ridiculously stupid (like any and all comparisons to the Beach Boys, and Justin’s understanding of women in general). This time, though, it seemed to make sense. JC was following it, anyway, and didn’t have the urge to smack Justin across the back of the head. 

“They’ll figure it out, man,” JC said. “Also, I don’t think Lance knows how to deal with anything except casual sex when it comes to men, which is, you know, not good.” Justin nodded, nibbling on his nails, and JC leaned against him, just because. “How’d this all start again?” 

“Chris,” Justin said. 

“Chris,” JC repeated, just to say his name but not very loudly, since Chris’s ears could pick up things from miles away. JC was getting too used to saying Chris’s name, though usually he was flat on his back and begging, or spread over Chris, teaching him how to bottom (Chris already liked to do it, but it sometimes hurt him. JC wanted to help Chris get used to it, because fucking Chris was really, really hot). Regardless, it felt nice to say it here. “Good old Chris.” 

“Sure.” 

“Yep. Chris,” JC said again. Justin nodded. 

~~~ 

Joey felt really abandoned. Lance was acting like a complete bonehead, one of his best friends (because it had to be one of them, even if he didn’t know who) gave him a book that totally shook his entire world to pieces, JC and Chris spent more time fucking than any normal people should so they never hung out anymore, and Justin wouldn’t stop talking about Britney. Plus, they were all laughing at him. Somehow, Joey knew this. They could have just told him. 

“Kel, have sex with me, please,” Joey said when Kelly showed up with Brianna slumped over her shoulder, sucking her thumb. Airplanes knocked Brianna right out for hours, which was a relief since she travelled so much. Kelly smirked and shook her head. “Come on, Kel. Please.” 

“Joey, don’t be an idiot. No,” Kelly said, shuffling Brianna off into Joey’s arms. 

“Even you think I’m gay,” Joey moaned, slumping onto the bed and arranging Brianna on his chest. She opened her eyes, confused but awake, so he petted her until her eyelids flickered shut again. “Kill me now. How did this happen? I was so straight and then suddenly, everything I knew about myself is a lie.” 

Kelly laughed. 

“No, Kel. This is serious. I’m gay,” Joey said. “There, I’ve said it. I’m gay!” 

“Joey, listen to me. Lance is gay; JC is gay. At the very most, you’re gay like Chris, and at the very least, you’re gay like Justin,” Kelly said, sitting next to him on the bed. Joey looked up at her, letting her settle a hand in his hair and comb at it. 

“But Justin is straight,” Joey said. 

“Exactly. Joey, you’re. How do I say this nicely? I really think you might be overreacting to whatever inspired this little freak out. I mean, I like to think I know you. You’ve never shown any interest in any guys, as far as I can tell,” Kelly said and looked at Joey for confirmation. He deflated under her gaze. “Joey, you haven’t. Have you?” 

“Sometimes, you know, sometimes I get a bit enamoured with a guy, you know, because I respect him, and maybe I overdo it, but I overdo everything. I know this. I didn’t know that the guys knew this, or that they thought, like, it meant I wanted to jump the guy’s bones, and then. Lance started looking good a few weeks ago, you know, and it was nothing, really, I could forget about it. And then some moron left me a book, the same book that finally shut Chris up about being gay when he wasn’t, and I, also a moron, read the book. And then I kissed Lance, because I was worried he was going to die, and now he blushes whenever he looks at me, and lord help me, Kelly, but I want to kiss him again, all over,” Joey added, gasping in a deep breath. He felt light-headed in the wake of the explanation. Kelly just looked baffled. “See, I’m gay!” 

“Okay, so you might be gay like Chris,” Kelly said slowly. “But Joey, really. So you’re flexible, a lot of people are. I am,” Kelly added, and Joey stared at her. He could not believe this. “What? Come on, Joey. Did you really think Angie was just an old friend of mine?” 

“Yes!” Joey wailed, throwing an arm over his eyes. It was truly amazing that Brianna could sleep through all of this, but just so long as nobody was crying, very little fazed her. She was the best baby in the world, which was a good thing, since Joey couldn’t stop yelling. “Kel!” 

“Oh, stop your crying, you big baby. So you want Lance, big deal. He’s hot, and he’s nice, and he’s your best friend. People kill to fall in love with their best friends, Joey. It’s every girl’s fantasy. I think it’s romantic,” Kelly said and kissed him on the forehead. Joey moaned and shook his head. Kelly was supposed to sleep with him, to make him straight again, not encourage him to mack on Lance. Kelly sucked. Speaking of which, 

“Um, can you, um,” Joey said and felt his face start to burn. Kelly looked at him expectantly, and Joey folded his hands over Brianna’s ears. “Well, okay. When I say I want to kiss Lance all over, I mean. All over.” Joey opened his eyes wide for emphasis. 

Kelly laughed. “Oh my god, Joey. You are not asking me this.” 

“Please, Kel. You’re so good at it, and like, this is your fault. You were supposed to talk me out of this, not put ideas in my head,” Joey said. Kelly was Catholic too, which meant she had high levels of guilt. She wouldn’t say no because it was cruel to leave Joey like this. “I have bananas, Kel. I swear, I’m freaking out here. Help me.” 

“You are such a persuasive bastard,” Kelly said, thumping him on the stomach. “I’m remembering how I got pregnant in the first place.” 

“You can still sleep with me, if you like,” Joey said, hopeful. 

“Shut up, Joey.” 

~~~ 

Lance got the extra key from Justin, who was responsible for them in Columbus, and went to sleep in between Chris and JC at three in the morning. Neither of them woke up when he kicked off his slippers and snaked into the bed, squirming down until they rolled apart and let him in. He closed his eyes and tried to sleep for a few hours. When he woke up again, Chris was snuffling in his ear, and JC was curled into a ball under his arm. Lance missed them, in a really warped way, but he knew he couldn’t go back to them, not even if Joey left the picture. Lance really hoped Joey didn’t leave the picture. 

“Oh, hey,” JC said sleepily, unfurling then stretching, and kissed Lance on the lips, mouth closed, like a friend. JC was very naked, and so was Chris, who was also stirring, and Lance was just glad he had all his clothes on or he would probably do something stupid. Instead, he just rubbed a hand over the small of JC’s back. JC was warm and soft. “How’s Joey?” 

“Confused.” Lance closed his eyes; they were burning. “I’m confused.” 

“We all are,” Chris muttered. 

~~~ 

Justin realised that ever since he’d become consumed with the need to see Joey and Lance together and happy, he hadn’t thought about Britney once, until she called saying she wanted the house in Beverly Hills, and he didn’t have a say one way or the other. It was hers. She sent the papers with the toilet seat that had his picture on it, circa MMC. He always thought that was a bit odd, but Britney had wanted them. Now, he was stuck on tour, with a personalised toilet seat he would never use and didn’t have room for. Thankfully, since they were in Memphis, his mom would probably take it. She stored a lot of his junk in the garage. 

Justin liked the look of an empty arena, and his family (all fourteen million of them) weren’t arriving for another few hours, which gave him time to frolic in the seats as everything was set up. He found Lance up in the nosebleeds, binoculars pressed to his eyes. 

“What are you doing?” Justin asked, and Lance jumped, dropping the binoculars to the ground and pressing a hand to his heart. Justin used to feel bad about Lance’s jumpiness, his wonky heart and all, but he was delighted to realise, now that Lance was in a fine working order, that it was really rather fun. “Are you spying on Joey?” 

“No,” Lance said. “Yes. I can’t help it.” Lance’s face flared bright red. “And god, here I go again. Tell me, Justin, was I always a girl? God.” Lance put his hands on his cheeks, shaking his head. Justin laughed. “He kissed me, you know.” 

Justin punched Lance in the arm. “You idiot! Then what’s the problem?” 

“He hasn’t kissed me again, and I. Look at me. I’m a goddamn tomato,” Lance muttered. “And whenever he looks at me, all I want to do is take off my clothes. Somehow, Timberlake, this is all your fault.” Lance socked Justin back, right in the funny bone. 

“Ow! Fuck!” Justin’s arm twitched. “That hurt, you asshole.” 

“Good. You ruined my relationship with Joey. You and Chris, and I don’t even know how you did it, but you did. God.” Lance put his face in his hands. “Why doesn’t he do anything? I’m the thinker; he’s the doer. He’s already done once. Oh god,” Lance said, pulling at his cheeks, “maybe he doesn’t want to. Fuck! I didn’t even think about that. He’s realised I’m a guy. Goddamn it.” 

“Okay, Lance, you’re freaking out, bro. Deep breaths, okay?” Justin said, rubbing circles over Lance’s back. Justin wasn’t too good with the comforting thing, JC was much better at it, but Justin was pretty sensitive to people and their emotions. It was why, when Chris was worked up, Justin tended to be carried away with it. Plus, this was Lance, who stayed calm through everything (unless pyro and fireworks were somehow involved), especially when Justin didn’t think it was possible, like when he sat them all down to tell them he was going to try to go to space. He’d been so stoic that Justin hadn’t reacted until later, when the reality hit and twisted up his intestines. So when Lance freaked out, it was hard not to freak out with him. Or laugh, because maybe it was a little bit funny, too. Just a little bit. 

“Why are you smiling?” Lance asked suddenly, “does my pain amuse you, asshole?” 

“No,” Justin squeaked out, shaking his head. Justin wracked his brain for a smaller, though no less important reason why his face was split in a helpless grin besides the fact that yes, Lance’s pain did amuse him. “No, it’s just. It just hit me. He kissed you, man. Joey the Straight kissed Lance the Gay. It wasn’t the other way around. What did you do?” 

Lance’s brow creased. “I didn’t do anything. He caught me off-guard.” 

“Well, okay. There’s your problem in a nutshell. Either, you have to kiss him first, to assure him that, yeah, you wanted him to do it, or you know, entice him into doing it again.” Justin eyed Lance, who was dressed in huge sweats and a ratty old tee. Lance followed his eyes and sighed. “Show some skin, man. He already likes you for your personality and your brain. Remind him that, you know, he’ll also get your mega-hot body.” Justin nodded, to affirm himself. It’d worked for Britney and him, which maybe wasn’t saying much. 

Justin picked up the binoculars and looked around. JC and Chris were talking under the stage, leaning into each other. Justin sighed. They were morons, too. He rotated the lenses around until he saw Joey looking up at them. Justin waved, and Joey waved back. He looked over to Lance, who was bright red again. Justin elbowed him hard. “Wave back.” 

“No,” Lance said, and Justin dug his elbow into Lance’s ribs. “Ow! No!” 

“Wave back,” Justin repeated, “or I’ll make you.” Justin dug in deeper, putting all of his weight into it. Lance folded beside him, but Justin wasn’t going to give up. The tour was almost over. Something had to give now, and it was going to be Lance. “Do it. Do it, Bass.” 

“God, fine. Ow,” Lance said and waved, half-assed at first but after one last jab Justin was nearly knocked unconscious by Lance’s flailing hand. On the ground, Joey kept waving. Lance’s face was split in a grin, and Justin bitterly regretted the distance. Even he was getting frustrated with this mess, and yeah, maybe it was his fault. But Chris started it. 

~~~ 

In Ft. Lauderdale, when Lance was wearing a tight tee-shirt and a pair of fleece trackpants that Joey liked to pet so much, Joey grabbed Lance by the elbow and pulled him into a storage closet, which was empty except for a mop and a light bulb. Lance, who had been grabbed by fans before and tugged into locking rooms, yelped, but Joey said, “hey, relax, it’s just me.” Lance nodded. It was, always, just Joey. That was the problem. 

The light was dim, and Lance didn’t want to look at Joey, but there was no place else to focus. He wanted to take off his clothes, wanted them to slither from his body and show himself, all of him, to Joey. He felt naked already, really. It was just a matter of schematics. He felt so alive suddenly, like Joey’s eyes held the universe, just a blink away. Lance looked at him. 

“I’m going to try this again,” Joey mumbled and put his hands on Lance’s neck, using his thumbs to lift Lance’s jaw. And his mouth was right there, right there. So hot, and wet but not overly so, and Lance remembered this time to kiss back, to open up and offer his tongue. God, he needed to take off his clothes. His hips rolled forward, desperate, and when Joey pulled back, Lance didn’t look away. Just breathed deep and yanked off his shirt, and tugged at Joey’s until it was gone. And Joey’s skin, his skin was so hot and plush, and Lance kissed him on the shoulder, and on the throat, and everywhere he could, hands on Joey’s back and slicking down to Joey’s ass, where he squeezed and pulled him forward. God, Lance wanted to take off his pants too, he was so hard and so was Joey, but they were in a fucking utility closet, and suddenly, that didn’t matter either, because Lance pushed his trackpants off his hips and showed himself, his dick, his body, everything to Joey. Joey laughed a bit, like he was startled, and Lance blushed a fierce red but not out of embarrassment. No, he thought he was going to pass out, he felt so light-headed. Especially when Joey lowered his body, knees clacking against the ground, and put his mouth, right there, right there. Lance loved him so fucking much. 

~~~ 

So Chris decided JC was his boyfriend, even if JC didn’t know. He was Chris’s first boyfriend, which was nice. Chris phoned up his mother, and she didn’t believe him, but nobody ever believed him at first. His truths were the kind that made sense much later, when it turned out he was actually right. Nobody liked to believe Chris was always right. Under the shit, and the drama, and all that crap, Chris was never wrong. It was also quite nice. 

Chris walked around the corner as Lance and Joey came out of the utility closet, Joey’s hand low on Lance’s hip, guiding him into the hallway. Lance looked pretty out of it, which mean they’d either fucked in the closet, or gotten high in the closet. Looking at Lance, Chris couldn’t tell, and Joey was no help. His helpless, sated expression didn’t betray much, either way. Chris hoped, for all their sakes, it was the former. It had to be. Joey’s mouth looked overly red, and fucked, and neither of them were all pupil. Chris grinned. 

“Welcome to the club, dude,” Chris said and smacked Joey on the ass. 

“Yeah, yeah. You were no help, so stop looking so satisfied,” Joey said and bopped him on the head with his free hand. The other one was now under the edge of Lance’s pants, fingers curled around his hipbone, and Chris found himself grinning so big that his face hurt. Lance smiled dizzily, tipping his head back on Joey’s shoulder, and Chris laughed at them. All in all, Chris decided, a pretty good day. 

~~~ 

Justin headed up to the nosebleeds, to sit and watch the crew set up. Two more shows and they were off for over a year. Things would be fine, he knew, but still, it was a bit sad. He always got misty near the end; he really loved the guys. It was always weird to go home and be his own person. The idea that he would have to do it in a recording studio terrified him. 

“Hi,” JC said, sitting down next to him. His eyes were red, and he had a kleenex pressed to his nose. “Sad,” he said, by way of explanation, and gestured at everything. Justin nodded and put his head on JC’s shoulder, to offer comfort. JC sniffled. “It was a good tour.” 

“The best,” Justin said. Waterily, JC grinned down at him, and Justin smiled back, squeezing a hand over JC’s knee. “You’re the best, C. I’ll make sure Chris knows that.” 

“I think he’s figured it out, man. He’s already lying about commitment ceremonies to his mother, so he must be serious about something. Hopefully, not that, since that’s way too much, but we don’t need to say it to each other to know. Thanks, though.” 

“God, he’s a freak,” Justin said, looking down to where Chris was skipping across the floor, hassling the crew, and JC giggled, waving at Chris until Chris noticed. JC was a freak too, which just cemented the idea in Justin’s head that Chris and JC were meant to be. Compared to each other, they were almost normal. It all worked out in the end, Justin supposed. 

“But, soft!” Chris shouted, getting down on one knee. Justin covered his face with his hands. This was going to get stupid really, really fast. “What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun! Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon!” 

Justin peeked through his fingers to see JC standing up, leaning over the guardrail. Immediately, Justin squeezed his eyelids back together. This was too weird, even for him, especially when JC started yelling back: “O Romeo, Romeo! Wherefore art thou Romeo? Deny thy father and refuse thy name; or, if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love, and I'll no longer be a Capulet!” They were such freaks, Justin could hardly believe it. God. He opened his eyes again. 

“You fucking sweet-talker, you!” Chris hollered. “Get down here!” 

JC looked at him. “Go,” Justin said quietly, and JC nodded and skittered off down the stairs. Chris threw a kiss to Justin, flinging his hand through the air, and Justin gave him the finger back. Whether or not Chris could see it wasn’t important. It was the principle of the thing. 

Satisfied, Justin sat back. His work here was done. Joey and Lance were entirely (please god, please let Chris be telling the truth; he’d left Justin a text message on his cell not five minutes before saying that Joey and Lance had fucked for hours in a utility closet, which Justin didn’t entirely believe but wanted to, badly) in love; JC and Chris were freaks but also in love. And yeah, maybe Justin had nothing to show for anything, except an ex-girlfriend who had stolen his house, but it wasn’t like Justin didn’t have hordes of women after him. He’d figure something out. Maybe he’d give Ms Janet a call.


End file.
